Archive for January 4th, 2016

A Little Holiday Warmth

The holidays are not my most favorite time of year. At best, I approach them the same way I would a category 4 hurricane: prepare for the worst and hope for the best. Here is part of my holiday wrap up.

For some ill-defined reason, I decided to take the new car for a drive into New England. My destination was a yarn store that is two hours and 45 minutes away, provided one knows how to get there.

The first inkling of trouble came not more than 15 minutes from home. The medication I take gives me terrible hot flashes. Usually they start with my ears, then proceed to the face and neck. This one was different. It started really fast on the backside of my thighs, rear end and back. I pulled the car to the side of the road and got out to get some cold fresh air. I had never experienced a hot flash that travelled so fast and grew so intense so quickly.

When I went to get back into the car I touched the seat with my hands and immediately jumped away. The seat was hot to the touch. If my hot flash was that intense to make the seat that hot was I just seconds away from self-immolation? Thinking I might go up in flames at any moment, I pulled out my cell phone, paced along the side of the road, and called The Skipper.

I told him that the hot flash was so intense it made the driver’s seat of the car hot. “I might explode into flame at any moment, what should I do?” I asked.

He gave a low chuckle and said he used the car that morning and turned on the heated seat feature. All I had to do was turn it off. Really. I didn’t even know the car had that feature. It is the last thing someone with hot flashes wants.

He described where the seat heating control was and how to turn it off. I waited 5 minutes for the seat to cool before I got back in. If I had been in my right mind, I would have turned around and headed home. Instead, I drove on.

The last time I used the car was to go to the dentist for oral surgery. At that time, I had half a tank of gas which was plenty for someone facing immediate death. However, it is not enough gas to get from New York to my destination in Massachusetts. At the behest of the car which was now talking and dinging about low fuel, I pulled into a busy station on the highway and got in line to get gas. How hard can it be to fill up a car with gas?

When it was my turn at the pump I got out, walked around to where the gas opening was and I couldn’t open it. I pulled, pried, banged, all the while trying to act cool like I knew what I was doing. The thing wouldn’t open. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see more cars getting in line waiting and I was unable to access my gas tank. My cool act of knowing what I was doing quickly crumbled as I madly tried to pull the darn thing open. That’s when a man about 3 cars behind mine exited his car and started walking toward me. Naturally I thought he’s going to shoot me and who can blame him, I’m holding up this whole line of cars. Instead he said, “You have to open it from inside the car.” He leaned in the driver’s side, pulled a little lever on the floor and like magic the thing opened. I thanked him profusely. It was my little moment of Christmas warmth.

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